What Not to Do - on Facebook

So it’s nearly study month, which means 70% of study time will be dedicated to aimlessly searching through Facebook. Some brave souls opt for suspending their accounts with the hopes of erasing social networking from their lives for 2 whole months. I don't have that kind of self- discipline. And I’m not that delusional. Looks like Mark and I are in it for the long haul.

For those of you who’ll be accompanying me on the procrastination train that is Facebook, I’ve made a list of things that people do on FB that seriously annoy me. I’d appreciate it if any offenders could take note and adjust their behaviour accordingly – would make my "study" time far less irritating.

   1.       Don’t “like” your own status. Aside from a frape, you wrote it yourself so there’s a high probability that you already like the fact that you’re “Going to London tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!” You don’t have to reiterate it for us, it’s okay; your excessive use of exclamation marks gave us some indication already.

   2.       Facebook isn’t a diary. Everyone has that one friend who clogs up your news feed with overly personal details of their life (if you don’t, it’s probably you). It results in very awkward replys to the effect of “Hope you’re okay” or “I’m here if you need to talk?” or that one person who doesn't quite know how to respond and just “likes” it instead. Bad call.

   3.     “Bex Clune is at Bed” Really? Was this necessary? It’s like 11.30pm on a Monday night.

   4.      "LOVE YOU SOOOO MUCH!I'm the luckiest girl in the world!!These past 3 days have been the best ever, so happy your my boyfriend!!Love you 4EVA!" Now I don’t want to come across as some desperate, jealous singleton -  I usually love nauseating, romantic gestures (See Youtube videos in previous post).  But when someone’s writing posts to this effect EVERY SINGLE day (I’m not exaggerating, I’ve seen it) it just becomes cringey. Get a room - or a phone.

   5.       Using Facebook as Twitter. If you’re posting more than 6 statuses a day(and that’s seriously pushing it), follow this link and set up an account okay?
 https://twitter.com/signup  
Problem solved. Now you can tell anyone who wants to follow you that you're "Really tired today, FML" 

Surviving RAG Week...

Had a little too much fun last night and feel like you’re being brutally tortured? 

Unless your one of those abnormal freaks who doesn’t get hangovers, your body is mercilessly punishing you. You’ll definitely need some reinforcements to help reduce the severe, dehydration, cutting blindness and throbbing pain from the knife that’s stabbing your head.

Some say the best cure for a hangover is to avoid drinking. But it's RAG Week people, not an option.

This year we’re "responsible" Final Year students and may even have to venture into lectures during RAG Week (the horror, I know.) As I’ve been preparing for the week ahead, I can’t help thinking how I’m going to try and resemble a human being for my 9am lectures.

Here’s a checklist to avoid looking like Zach Galifianakis for the next week.

1.       Water…and lots of it – Winner of all hangover cures. No matter how much you think you’ve drank, always drink more.

2.       Shower – Seriously, not one to skip. Think of the person who has to sit next to you for that double lecture.

3.       Make – up – Requires effort but unfortunately needs to be applied. FYI, this is just for the girls – a face full of makeup on a guy might not be the best idea if you’re trying to tone down the hangover.

4.       Denial – Try convincing yourself you’re not about to die. Reassure everyone you meet that you “Feel fantastic – no hangover!” Never know, might work.

5.       Find some friends – Suffering in groups usually eases the dreaded “fear.”

Ta – da!! Sure, you couldn’t exactly run a marathon or anything but at least you’re able to function in society.

One hangover down, 5 more to go!

Mission accomplished – time to head over to the New Bar to get an early start on tonight’s plan.

You: 1, RAG Week: 0  (for now...)